This is Not Something I should Delete I Guess

As I was saying, I was trying to get over my problems but this guy murdered what I was trying to say. Figures. He always ruins it.


So anyway, what I was trying to say... To wrap it up there is no General Judgment. That's some Catholic nonsense. But that phrase is a curse to say.


Anyway... so I can expect antagonism. But there is no God. I'm stuck. I've tried to dethrone this guy thousands of times. But he won't let me. So he dictates my life and tortures me and there is nothing I can do about it and it will never change ever. This must be so exciting for me. And course an added venture: "RIGHT WHEN YOU GET THE FACTS RIGHT YOU'RE CURSED AND NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU," every time. I'm beginning to think that is a lie. I think the every-time-something-is-reacted-with-something-else-every-time is based on lying. I think this is nonsense.


Well whatever. I don't really want to type about this crap anymore. Of course they're now celebrating because this round of denials went hand in hand with me going at it harder than normal. Still the same denial of course gleefully waiting until it's the last time and then they can declare victory. Figures. They were waiting.


Alright, so what I said, everything is wrong. Everything always goes wrong. That's not even a stretch to say that. I'm calculated so everything is wrong.


I have to just go about this... PERFECTLY.


Well alright, so uh, I guess there is no end times. I've wanted to debunk this so hard but it's like a pyramid full of traps and I just can't get over it all. And the torture is like... through the roof. I just must love getting tortured.


So with there being no God, what's there to judge me for saying those stupid cursed words? The universe is not an incarnation so that's moot. It's a Terraria debuff as I've said and it goes away with normative measures: time. It's just a timed debuff. Too bad.


All internal thoughts are just you. I've said as much. It's all in your head. And when I'm unhinged, it all goes crazy. Not to say everything is internal obviously. It's not really all in your head. But the personalities that begin to get ruthless and start judging and pushing me around aren't real. Then I realized the thing I keep repeating: there is no God. So when it comes to the thing judging you on the inside, it's probably something that just wants to be perfect, and it's not a soul, it's just you. It's all in your head. The soul is the thing that runs your insides or whatever, it doesn't really have a separate incarnation or is actually real. It's just a type of life time energy.


So when you get all mixed up on the inside, it's because life isn't simple or easy. However it manifests, it's just part of the journey. Process or whatever. It's better just left to go away, but that isn't easy either. I grew up without this nonsense for years and years and I was happy. So I know this is possible. I had it then, I can have it again, but this time matured. It's like absolute perfect that is right to resist, but it is impossible and needs to be ignored. The reason for this is it will not save me and is just likened to wounds to make me grow. It isn't itself something real.

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